Deepflare

Idul Fitri 2009 in Malaysia because my dad was to continue studying phd in Malaysia and also in Malaysia mama with papa.  Lifetime experience Idul Fitri not at home. But with the family. My small family simple and happy. I hope the year 2010 in the village could Idul Fitri.  Idul Fitri in a foreign country is not in the village quite sad, because it can not meet other relatives and friends. No angpao, do not buy new clothes, but still can Idul Fitri.  But it is also not a good home. Because there is still no change from within me.  Year 2009 an historic year in this family.  Must reproduce patience and enthusiasm.

this mixed feeling of happy and sad. I can just sit pensive. halt, will not know whom to talk. I can just feel alone in the dark at night. feel lonely do not know which direction. I think that only dreams. feelings are often appear every once I alone. why each person can only understand about themselves? can not feel that it is felt to the nearest person. Therefore, for reasons I still and always keeps whatever I feel.
I may not find someone who can understand the full self to me. I can only try and be patient. single-minded and do what is best for themselves and other people.

with writing what I feel. I hope I can disappear a little burden on the mind. I hope everyone does not judge other people from the outside appearance. but from whom and how he is.

approaching fasting month. I want to gather with my family. gather again as before. but I am not powerless. hearing people to take home page. I am sad because they do not have to know where to return. because my family not in Padang.

i very happy to be art student. that is like dreams to me. but where I get a phone that makes me sad and aware of the condition at this time. I have to keep trying. wherever I learn if I did not try it will still be stupid. I hope I can generate their own income and can pay a student and I live. not pester their parents again.

for the second time it dropped out of love at the start of study. perhaps she was not the best for me. feeling sad I will be roasted to become spirit. I will feel this sense of self. and will own up. sometimes we must learn from each step